In fact, I gave birth to both of our daughters drug-free. I don't know how I did it; my stubbornness was indeed incomparable to many. I was determined to have natural deliveries, and I did not want to be overshadowed by a haze of drugs. Well, I got exactly what I asked for along with the good and the bad that came with that decision. Ouch!
|The first picture of my daughters together at home.|
|Me - still a kid, but also married and starting my life with David.|
|My girls - about the age when I began getting sick.|
They gave me tremendous determination to pull through the worst.
In fact, my body had gone so deep into crisis that my cardio-functions were shutting down. Basically, I'd exhale a long breath out and my body was too worn out to automatically take the steps to draw in another lung-full of air and my heart could not keep up the pace needed to sustain life. Eventually, these basic bodily functions started puttering. God only knows how I made it through those times.
After I had the official Code Blue called while hospitalized, I was amazed because that EXACT sensation was familiar to me. Obviously, I had been coding off and on while at home, somehow pulling out of it, for weeks. The realization was terrifying. THIS is a code? I've ALREADY GONE THROUGH THIS several times. Often, it'd occur in my sleep; I'd awake without any air in my lungs, and I would go through horrifying moments of opening my mouth and doing all I could to pull in air. It almost would feel as if I were under water, unable to breath, very similar. Not pleasant.
|My girls so bonded and this is the time in our lives when|
I am trying to recover from being sick for so long.
|My husband, best-friend and my personal hero.|
|My girls - we made it through terrible times and came out stronger.|