My mind still has the same old excitement building with anticipation of taking a road trip, but I am now being mentally assaulted with anxiety as a road trip approaches because my body becomes a mass of pain and struggle as each vibration from the road moves through parts of me that are no longer "me."
I can see that my body can endure approximately two hours on the road, and then it is feeling the impact of the road trip, which is now a great hardship on my body.
This has been devastating to me because I have always loved driving and going places by highway. Even more upsetting, my daughters each live more than two hours one-way from my current home.
One consideration I've been making, lately, is that a truck is not the best form of transportation for my particular difficulties. Since my upper spine has been reconstructed, and is, essentially, in existence due to fused cadaver bone and double-sided hardware with screws and bolts, any road vibration or movement, especially in a truck, will naturally travel to the highest point and one little bump, in a truck, follows the natural course of motion which is not good for the neck area.
There goes my dream of wanting to buy a Land Cruiser! This is another area of shifting changes requiring adaptation to limitations. And yes, I despise the word "limitation." However, that word is simply a vocabulary description of what all of us must confront, in one way or another, sooner or later. Life always has limitations and boundaries that we must face.
A lower profile vehicle with a cushioned shock system is the combination I need to be able to travel, realistically. I had to laugh when thinking about this because I realize this is the reason many people with painful body-issues drive a Buick! Regardless, a truck, no matter how cushioned, is not going to work for my body during long distant travel that will be over two hours. For others, a truck will work, but for my cervical spine, it's a disaster. This fact is not a personal choice, it's a forced reality-check that I must confront.
That being said, I made the road trip from the Houston area to San Marcus as a passenger this week to witness my youngest daughter receiving her class ring at Texas State University. The drive was at least three hours, one-way, and this was a major challenge for my body to endure in a truck driven by my husband. But, I was thrilled to still be able to make it and to see such beautiful moments in life!
With my youngest daughter who now has her university ring! |
My daughter, Stefie, was adorable as her 90-pound petite frame crossed in front of the stage area to get her ring and to dip it into the waterfall that held water from the San Marcus River that runs into the Guadelupe river. That is the tradition, to dip the ring in the river waters that play such a massive part of this university's history.
I loved it!
Her achievement is a beautiful time for me, as a mother. I have now witnessed both of my daughters getting their class rings for their university studies and this has been a huge blessing. I sit back and know that something went right for my two daughters to have had the drive, the ability, the support, and the commitment to earn their four-year degrees in such a strict amount of time.
We took our growing family out to dinner to celebrate our youngest getting her class ring, and it was wonderful that she got to be the reason for the celebration; it was her turn to shine. She earned this moment and a parent is always very proud to share such times in the life of their adult child.
Stefie and her Aunt Normandy, both showing their Texas State rings! A family tradition that's very special! |
Timeless. |
I shook my arms and squeezed my hands together while looking at them as if they were foreign attachments to my body. It was not a good feeling. Unlike impinged blood flow that can be returned with an adjustment of our limbs, this numbness remained for nearly 45 minutes. I could still move my hands and fingers, but they were in a state of being "asleep" in a flash and remained in this manner for an extended period of time. All I can think is that the spinal cord impingement that I still live with in my cervical spine had been jostled a bit too much, and I paid a price.
My spine issues go well beyond experiencing back pain, certain situations cause my spine to be under strain with the spinal cord still being impacted by direct impingement, so this affects the functioning of my body. It's not pleasant. And this, of course, creates issues with my Addison's disease. Many people with Addison's disease are dealing with additional problems that make managing the Addison's a difficult prospect. However, as a precaution, I did have my auto-blood pressure cuff in my purse to help me prevent an Addison's crash.
I can tell anyone with Addison's disease that a wrist blood pressure cuff is probably one of your best defense mechanisms to combat plummeting vitals that are often difficult to measure, until we are feeling the side-effects of fading vitals due to sudden blood pressure dips. Even with stress doses of HC taken while traveling, I still have trouble balancing my condition. It's a challenge.
I've heard many fellow Addisonians discuss travel by plane being just as difficult, if not more difficult, and often shocking, by the impact traveling by air has on their body. It appears that flying requires hydration to be a super-priority for those with Addison's. Also, a person's body endures more hardship with jet-lag negatively impacting an Addisonian on a level that most "normal" people cannot comprehend. I believe that having Addison's disease or Adrenal Insufficiency, especially if your condition is considered "brittle," can make any kind of travel a health challenge.
For me, I can't help but mourn my inability to travel by car without a second thought, as I had done for most of my life. Going on a car trip is now like signing up for voluntary torture for me, but it's amazing the level of torture we will endure to do things we love. Still, I opt to travel by road as infrequently as possible because I need to stay independent and the road trip can take a massive toll on my health.
I guess this is the reason I absolutely LOVE vacationing by cruise. Having the ability to retreat to your cabin and to be supine can be tremendously helpful for a person who has major health challenges, especially if you are not prone to getting seasick. Being able to enjoy such a vacation is empowering, but I can't orchestrate all family gatherings and special events to be held on a cruise-line. Such a shame!
Anyway, I have had an awesome time seeing my baby get her beautiful class ring and to honor her achievements. She's an amazing young gal and has much to offer society. She will make a wonderful Child Life Specialist.
My father-in-law with my Stefie! |
And...I am going to work on test-driving vehicles that can better provide a cushioned, low-profile, shock-absorbing ride that is less likely to give me major wobble-head problems.
Then, New York, New York...HERE I COME! :-)
Congratulations to both of you!First of all, to Steffie for persevering and to you for the intense effort it took to enjoy the moment! All the best to both of you.
ReplyDeleteIan --- Stefie and I BOTH thank you!!!
ReplyDeleteLana
WOW, yet again, such inspiration, without people like you guys out there to give me some boots up the preverbial I think I would hide in a corner and not bother. I've been unwell for so many years but was being treated for epilepsy when it wasn't. I had my first 2 crisis last month and was so scared. Your blogs helped me a lot. I could relate to them and not feel it was me being mad!! Thank you so much. Steph. x
ReplyDeleteI have a hard time in the car too.....I am the car sick kid. A long drive is torture for me. While my son Dan was away at college, which was only a two hour drive, I only visited twice. And I did make it to his graduation. Knowing how hard that trip was for you, I''m sure it made it all the more special for your daughter! So glad you got to go and enjoy the special day!
ReplyDeletemo
Mo, I know that was difficult for you because it's been very sad for me to not simply be able to get into a vehicle and make the drive, without a second thought, to go see either of my daughters. But, my reality, like yours, requires that I not torture my body because my daughters have their own lives and I must live mine as healthy as possible. Still, it's frustrating. My mother, even though she had a Polio-ravaged body, could drive endlessly. I have a few issues with my health, but it seems the cervical spine reconstruction and continued problems present the most difficulties during travel or even for day-to-day movements I had taken forgranted. Addison's simply compounds the issues.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, I am very thankful that I was able to go see my daughter receive her ring because it was a special moment to always treasure. It was HER day and she deserved the love and support of her family. We were glad to share that time with her.
I hope you are doing ok! I've been reading and see you've been having hard days. Lately, I've been struggling, but trying to battle that infection and this body that wants to make things difficult at times. Still, I keep facing forward and hope things will get better!
Lana