Living with a serious medical condition might mean you have good days mixed in with a lot of bad days. It might mean that you must go to the doctor frequently or that you have to take medicine on a regiment.
For me, I see three of my regular docs every four months, at least. In between my appointments, I try to stay on schedule with my medications and do what I can to live as healthy as possible. That means that some days I am full of boundless energy while other days find me pulling the covers over my head because I feel as if I cannot deal with the regular activities involving the world.
On some days, my body might be having such low blood pressure that it takes all my energy to simply get to the bathroom and back on my own --- my appetite disappears and I might feel extremely nauseated while struggling to not be pulled under this wave of low blood pressure. I take my stress doses, but this disease can really knock you on your butt.
Last month, I was speaking with my dad about fighting illness. I'm feeling rather sad that my father is now fighting his second round of cancer since my mom died from cancer seven years ago.
I'd like for cancer to disappear in a poof of smoke so we could all cheer and celebrate
 |
| Easter, me and my dad facing the bright Texas Sun, me with confetti left-over in my hair. Dad was able to shake the confetti straight out of all that hair of his. |
Since we're having to fight cancer by known methods, my dad finally had no more unexpected delays and was able to have the port surgically installed in his chest that will be used for Chemo treatments. My dad is doing his best to deal with his recent diagnosis of this second cancer that is extremely aggressive, but the prospect of all he's about to confront can be rather daunting.
Of all times for us to be selling our house and planning to move! I feel compelled to get a little apartment on the outskirts of town so I can be closer to my father. Where is our organization fairy to keep this move on track? Oh, I guess I am that Fairy --- I'm on volunteer duty and do not have wings nor do I sparkle.
I tell you the same thing I told my dad...some illnesses play with you. One day they visit and do their best to knock you around, the next day they leave you alone. Some illnesses hit your hard, others make a slow-fizz approach before it slams you down.
Sometimes, you must realize the condition is pulling on you and tugging you toward a life you don't want to embrace...you do your best to live well and to not make this disease the center of your world, but the disease pulls and pulls, trying to wear down your resolve. I say, PICK UP YOUR END and do all you can to get back what you've lost, so pull and don't let go!
 |
| Easter weekend...a positive tug in the health battle to capture as many wonderful moments as possible, in spite of ongoing health battles. |
The Tug-of-War with your health can be quite challenging, but try to stay in the game. Take it day by day, one day, you might be on the losing end of the battle and other days, you might end on top of the world as a champion...and the other days, in between, when you can tug back and re-gain some ground, do it and be pleased to have not lost ground.
Savor your wins, enjoy keeping your ground and when the bad days hit, get rested to regain your strength. In addition, don't forget your mental health!!! Direct your mind toward healthy thoughts and keep a good perspective.
If you experience a low moment, go through it as quickly as possible, then get back on track with self-talk that is positive and geared toward successful self-fulfilling prophecy. Often, our mind and our words help to create the existence we believe we are worthy to receive.
Challenge yourself to start thinking simple improved thoughts, such as, "I deserve a non-cluttered bedroom" or I am going to find ten things to smile about today because I'm grateful for the good things in the midst of hard times.
Work on PRESERVING your sweetness and showing your GOODNESS and protect your innocence. Stay as mentally prepared as possible for the next Tug-of-War battle that will come.
I'm telling myself that I am confronting the unknown, in so many areas of my life, but I am expecting the best case scenarios to eventually come through. And at each bit of good news that comes my way or bit of shining arrow pointing the way to goodness, I am thrilled. All those tug of wars have been worthwhile and I'll keep fighting the good fight, for as long as I can.
